Men often face various barriers to opening up about their struggles, influenced by cultural, psychological, and social factors.
What tips can we do as parents to support our sons and all the men in our lives to enjoy positive mental wellbeing?
- Cultural and Social Norms:
Men are often socialized to conform to traditional masculine norms, which emphasize strength, stoicism, and self-reliance. Research indicates that these norms discourage emotional expression and vulnerability. For example, Mahalik et al. (2003) found that men who strongly adhere to traditional masculine norms are less likely to seek help and express emotions, as doing so is seen as a sign of weakness . Practical TIP- In our homes we can encourage fathers to role model seeking help and support from family members. We can learn more about mental health presentations and other things that we do not know. -As parents we need to stay current and updated. - Fear of Stigmatization:
There is a significant stigma attached to mental health issues and emotional vulnerability among men. Vogel et al. (2011) demonstrated that men fear being judged or labeled as weak if they disclose their struggles. This fear of stigmatization leads to a reluctance to discuss their problems or seek professional help. Practical Tip- from a young age, normalise boys struggling with their emotions or being frustrated. For example when they have a melt down, try and refrain from ‘mukomana haadaro’ translated ‘boys don’t do that’ - Perceived Inadequacy of Emotional Expression:
Many men believe they lack the skills to effectively communicate their emotions. Research by Levant et al. (2009) shows that men often feel inadequate in expressing their feelings, partly due to limited emotional vocabulary and the societal expectation to suppress emotions. Practical Tip.. teach all your children on the importance and place of emotion. generally in many African Christian homes, emotions such as anger, sadness, anxiety are not clearly defined but shrouded in religious terms yet we see David in the book of psalms battling these emotions time and time again. Next time you feel anxious about something.. a new job, friendship, interview etc.. vocalise that and demonstrate practical strategies that you are applying to overcome the anxiety eg breathing exercise.. going for a walk, praying, meditation etc. - Concerns About Burdening Others:
Men often worry about burdening others with their problems, fearing that opening up might negatively impact their relationships or be seen as a drain on others’ emotional resources. Research by Addis and Mahalik (2003) found that men are less likely to discuss personal issues because they do not want to be perceived as a burden to their friends or family. - Lack of Supportive Environments:
Many men do not have access to supportive environments where they feel safe to express their struggles. A study by Courtenay (2000) highlights that men are less likely to find supportive spaces that encourage open emotional expression, as many social settings for men emphasize competition and emotional restraint over mutual support. Practical Tip- Normalise your children see you BUILDING life giving relationships. Talk about nurturing relationships, identify them together and discuss what makes them special. Who are the two people that you count on in our own life?
These factors collectively contribute to why men might struggle to open up about their problems, impacting their mental health and well-being. We can change that narrative and it begins in our homes.
What else can you add?
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